Working with the Collapsed Experiencer in the self-critical split! |
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During the two chair dialogue when the experiencer agrees with the critic in the conflict split, and they say, "my critic is right" is called collapsed self or experiencer. Managing a collapsed self is a therapeutic opportunity, and the successful working through of this impasse is key to the resolution of the dialogue.
The therapist's goal is to help the client access the feelings underlying the experiencing self's taking the "you're right" position to the critic. Clients in this collapsed state are essentially able to access only the critic's position, but doing so is associated with shame, depression, and other painful emotional processes.
The only way to access the primary adaptive emotions and needs is through the currently felt secondary experience of hopelessness and resignation. Thus, feelings of helplessness, powerlessness, and hopelessness themselves must be accessed and explored.
Route A) Accepting and working with the collapsed sense of self. Therapists selecting the first choice of action exercise the principle of acceptance of "what is," staying present and following the process. The therapist's goal is to provide a safe, accepting environment so that clients can find the source of strength within themselves. With the goal of Heightening Awareness so as to activate core experience: the therapist can empathically provide a process observation of nonverbal and paralinguistic indicators of the client's current state, such as "you are kind of hunched over in your chair, and your voice has become very small. I guess you must be feeling defeated."
Another possibility is for the therapist to offer Empathic Conjectures: that "feel into" the client's experiential state, of which the client may be only minimally aware. To do this, the therapist uses his or her own experiencing to imagine what the client is feeling in that moment, for example, "you are saying you just feel like there is nothing you can do, because you just don't deserve anything, and I guess this must leave you feeling pretty sad....?"
The therapist may want to use Experiential Teaching: The therapist can also validate the helpless, acknowledging that although it is a painful feeling that the client tries to avoid, it is also very real and the source of much difficulty. Further, the therapist can point out that embedded within the experience of weakness are more primary feelings such as sadness and anger, to which it is important to give expression, as this will ultimately lead to a change in view of self and problems.
Route B) Encouraging greater specificity in the critic. In this route, the therapist can move the client back into the critic chair and encourage the critic to be more specific in her criticisms. Such action can serve to paradoxically stimulate the "fight" inside the experiencing self, that is, to encourage the affective response that underlies the resigned, hopeless position.
(Elliott, Watson, Goldman, Greenberg, 2004) |
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#09 I am sad - EMOTION FOCUSEDHave you ever felt that if you let yourself cry your tears will never stop? As difficult as it can be sometimes, there are benefits of getting in touch with our sadness. Juliette Becking explains why 'It's sad to not be able to be sad'. |
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EFT trainings provides in-depth skill training through a combination of brief lectures, video demonstrations, live modelling, case discussions and extensive supervised role-playing practice. |
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Emotion Focused Therapy Support Group Monthly Gathering Sunday May 28th, 2023 from 11:00 AM to 1:00 PM PST on Zoom In these gatherings we'll watch a video demo of EFT work with a client by the pioneers, discuss the theory and practice of EFT and answer questions. If you are interested in joining our gathering please click on the link or RSVP to EFTSoCal@gmail.com This group is Free of charge Open to all mental health clinicians with or without any EFT training |
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Continuing Education Hours SoCal Institute of EFT trainings are co-sponsored by the Insight Center. The Insight Center is approved by the American Psychological Association to sponsor continuing education for psychologists. The Insight Center maintains responsibility for this program and its content. The California Board of Behavioral Sciences accepts APA CEs. |
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For previous Newsletters with educational blogs please click below |
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General model of Emotion Focused Therapy approach is based on that: Emotions are an adaptive orienting system and a source of information about thoughts, feelings, action readiness, motivations, and interpersonal interactions. Client experiencing (attention to and exploration of feelings and meanings) is the primary source of new information in therapy (as opposed to skills training, challenging maladaptive thoughts or interpretations).
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You have to arrive at your emotions before you can leave them. Les. Greenberg, PhD. |
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